The Fight For My Life

When Fabrice Muamba, a footballer, slumped in the middle of the pitch during a football match, his Bolton teammates feared the worst. They had seen medics attend to him on the football pitch. Many people believed Muamba wasn’t going to make it after his heart attack, even the medics present talked about how difficult his condition was, they said he had to fight for his life. Muamba lived because he fought so hard not to give up – even when his heart had given up on him.

When medics say people “fought” for their lives, they mean it literally. People who fight must find the strength to breath over and over again; they have to suck it in for as long as they can and hold on to life. As I turn another year on earth, it is fitting that I look back at my life and ask if I have fought dearly for the very breath I exhale today, fitting to look at the fights or non-events that had occurred because of my aversion to fighting. Have I fought for my life?

Looking back at situations that would have required me fighting dearly for my life, the situations that kept me on the edge between mortality and beyond, what was my instinctive reaction? When faced with daunting challenges that require resilience and grit, do I throw in the towel or do I keep fighting – like Fabrice did in the face of death?

One time I was air-bound and was suffering from Ear Barotrauma, it was so severe and intense that a full bottle of water and multiple sweets and swallowing later couldn’t stop it. I’d tried the Vulvasa Maneuver yet it wouldn’t stop. At some point, I stopped hearing totally and the flight attendants were worried. When it became so intense, I stopped trying to fightback. I basically sat back on my seat and imagined what the worst would be? Going deaf? People have done that and lived. I will survive. What about dying? Oh well, if now is the time, so be it. I literally gave up fighting. I stopped trying to do anything to solve my problem. I just let fate decide (more on this later) what my end would be. By thinking about the worst-case scenario, I was preparing myself for the end so whatever it was wasn’t going to take me by storm.

I strongly detest anything that threatens the balance of my inner peace. I’d rather give in than let whatever it is distort my equilibrium. I have lost count of the human relationships, opportunities and possessions I’ve lost because I wasn’t willing to fight, because once that relationship threatened to distort my inner peace, my instinctive reaction was to run. If I was ready to give up my own life to preserve my inner peace, nothing else was worth it. I always let fate decide what the outcome of my dealings would be. I always try not to influence these outcomes by anything peculiar to me.

It is against this backdrop that I remain ever grateful to the powers that be, albeit unforeseen, who have tried so hard despite my negligence to preserve my Being. I look back at my disposition about life and it’s not so hard to see where it all began.

Tales abound of how as a fetus I gave problems all through pregnancy. Looking back, it sure feels like something did not want me on this earth. Perhaps I was the last Airbender or the Seeker. Whatever it was, something must have wanted me not to make an entrance and in keeping with my style, I obliged. I made no efforts to come out of the womb when it was time, I had stayed in there for eleven months going to twelve months and yet no sign of movement. It looked like I was happy to just stay in there rather than distort my inner equilibrium. Even when I came out, it was not out of my own volition, I was forced out and was heading to the floor until a nurse clad in white held me with her gown. As usual, an “Angel” had appeared to save the day.

The events surrounding my birth has been mirrored in all the major events that have surrounded me. As I approach a new year, my most successful year yet, it’s so clear that no matter what I do – and I say this strongly, because the life I live now, I do not deserve – the powers that be appear to always back me, it appears they have me destined towards the very best things in life, even I can’t stop that journey.

Muamba is alive because he fought, according to the medics at least (Muamba himself alludes his survival to God). I am alive despite having given up my fights, because the powers that be keep fighting for me unconditionally.

Happy Birthday Ihemrochi, as you live another gracefully given year, may the powers that be keep fighting for you even against your own will.

Stay True!


2017 Review: Flourish and Grow

2017: Flourish and Grow. I Did Both.

When I got into 2017, God told me this was going to be a year of flourishing like the palm tree and growing like the Cedars of Lebanon. I heard him clearly and was so convinced that this year was going to be a great year for me.

I’m here to tell you that God told no lies. I flourished this year in all aspects. Had more than I’ve ever had before this year, really grew in all aspects. I surpassed all my 2016 achievements and milestones twice. Everything was really double double. As I reflect on the coming year, it time for my customary year review and I’m really filled with gratitude.

I’m trying to pick out the negatives from this year and there’s really none. I can’t pick any, except the fact that I still didn’t get serious with the gym yet again.

One thing I did notice well though was how God was always getting me out of difficult situations and taking the distractions out of my life. It sure looked like something was hell bent on making sure I didn’t go into the new year with some people and some things. I didn’t even have to do anything, all those things left my life just the same way they came.

And it really made sense. I’d talk about how the two things God told me at the beginning of the year played out – Flourishing like the Palm Tree and Growing like the Cedars of Lebanon. Before I continue, let me also remind you that God is very serious when it comes to times. The Sons of Issachar understood the times, little wonder they were left in charge of strategy for the Israelites. You can’t be strategic if you don’t understand the times in which God is playing over your life. God doesn’t joke with seasons and time, as you enter a new year, I can bet you that God is speaking, you got to listen.

Flourishing like the Palm Tree

The Palm Tree is a beautiful tree in its stride especially with those lush green leaves. The palm tree is a strong tree with root deeply rooted to the ground. You can’t just uproot a palm tree like that. The palm tree is known to be a harbinger of productivity, there are countless products that can be gotten from the palm tree and they are all economically viable. Palm Oil, Rafter sheets, Palm Kernel, Feed, Wood, etc. So when I think of the palm tree, I think productivity. This year has really been a productive year for me, I grew and got more for little. I also multiplied the works of my hands. I made more this year than the previous two years put together. I was not stressed this year at all, that’s one trait about flourishing, its naturally and easy going, like I can’t believe this year is ending already. It was so smooth all through, there was no hiccup. God came through before I appeared on many scenes.

Growing like the Cedars of Lebanon

The Cedars of Lebanon are known to be stout expansive strong trees, more like the Acacia. One of the attributes of the Cedar tree – particularly those found in the nigh regions of Lebanon – is the diameter of the tree. It can get really wide as it grows. So once I think of the Cedar, I think of growth, expansion, enlarged capabilities, but there’s also a downside with growth and expansion; things get demolished and knocked down. As I grew, I realised people who weren’t playing a role to my growth, people who were going to slow me down or hold me back were being knocked out of my picture, and like I mentioned earlier, I happened without my knowledge. I remember times this year when I got uncomfortable with things and I tried to fight that feeling, I didn’t know it was my being reacting to the expansion going on within. Some of the things I couldn’t do before, I was doing. I became more magnanimous. This year I crossed a lot of things off my bucket list, so many things I hadn’t done before or couldn’t do, God brought them my way. God gave me those things on a platter. Cedars don’t care about obstacles when they grow, they just grow. I really grew like those Lebanon trees.

I can’t wait for 2018. Like the year hasn’t even ended and God has already started working. He’s been dropping pointers, and all I can see is greatness. Thing is, I was not even deserving of all the things that came my way this year, like no way. But God showed that he really does show mercy and compassion on whomever he chooses. He has chosen me again for 2018, how can I not be happy?

Thank you for sharing the year with me, I hope you had a great year like me too. Looking forward to the new year with great optimism.

Stay True!

Miracle Roch.